I wish I were in a time tunnel where I could at leisure move from one time to another . Erase my mistakes and redo the things I did and did not...tell her I loved her more than any thing and adored her pretty face that lit up every morning and her bubbly personality that gave me hope to carry on and fight with life and complete my life missions. I wish I could give her more happiness and satisfy her need to be loved more and more. I wish I could give her more time when all she craved was my company and her constant bickerings about my giving her lesser time as i got busier and busier with my family and friends and my jobs and errands. Although God knows I tried and I made serious efforts to be with her every week and every month when i was far but i wondered and felt frustrated why she was not still happy to leave me and let me go home. Now I understand that feeling of letting go of your loved one...of feeling the pain of the one who is closest to your heart..of having that urge to hold them and touch them and cuddle them.
Yes she was my mom who quietly left me in a lurch one fine day two years back. I tried telling her I needed her and loved her that day but she only listened and nodded and forced a smile and uttered in her frail and feeble voice..a whimper..that from now on you are completely on your own.........
I am on my own mama but i will never be alone..I know...I have your memories imprinted in my mind..I have your picture posted like an old dried rose that fades with time but the beauty of that rose remains in your heart...I just want you to know Ami.you made me what i am today and I owe all this to you..I love you with all my heart and I miss you every day of my life!keep smiling and keep singing where ever you are!
No comments:
Post a Comment